Not your grandma's cloth diapers!

I think there is a terrible misconception about what cloth diapers are like TODAY!  Lets be realistic here, everything else has changed and advanced, so don't you think that diapers would too!  When people find out I cloth diaper my babies they look at me like alligators are crawling out of my mouth.  I get a lot of "seriously?!" "why?!" "didn't have enough work to do already?" type of responses, but I guess if you are that arrogant to judge before you even know what a cloth diaper looks like "these days," little I am going to say will change your mind.  However, I will try and clear up a few of the biggest misconceptions.

Fits at 4 months

still fitting at 13 months

1.) No safety pins required!  Crazy that the cloth diaper companies have caught on to the world of Velcro and even better, snaps!  So no I don't sometimes "stab" or "poke" my squirmy baby or toddler.

2.) They do NOT leak.  These cloth diapers are better at holding in the mess than regular diapers.

3.) I do not have to "dunk and swirl" my diapers in the toilet.  These diapers are made out of a material that all the poop doesn't stick to.  It is truly amazing how it works.  All you have to do is dump it in the toilet or even trash can if you take it out regular and throw the diaper in the hamper to be washed later.

4.) No my baby is not "hot under there!"  Yes the diapers do look a little heavier/bulkier, so I can see how that can be misleading, but neither one of my children has ever had a heat rash in a cloth diaper...as compared to the zillion of heat rashes they had before we started.

5.) No special detergent required.  At first I used the organic, Internet order stuff, but then I realized that good ol' Tide works the best.  Not Tide free and clear or any other specification, just Tide. And No, the diapers are not stained and dingy.  Just hang dry them outside in the sun and any stained spots you might have had will be completely gone.

Only buy the diaper once and it last until they are potty trained!  Talk about a money saver! 

I'm not judging anyone who doesn't cloth diaper, it is just something that has worked best for my family.  If you want to learn more about it , I would love to tell you how easy it is to do.  But the bottom line is, if the phrase, "its just another load of laundry," sounds like the worst thing ever, then cloth diapers are not for you.

My favorite diaper by far.  The boys say this one is the most comfy and it comes clean the best

Politics...ummm Conserv-lib-ind--etc me :)

I am not political person, which is weird because I married a very politically involved and very informed individual.  I might be in to it more if I had the time needed to research and make up my mind, but I simply do not have the time.  I don't want to be one of those people who just sounds ignorant because I just say whatever someone else says or just trust one source of information.  I get my news from web pages when I have time to look and about 20 minutes of news in the morning just before the boys get up.

I am also not very involved because I am not the type to campaign or try and change someones mind.  My way of thinking is, if you are happy with what you believe, then who am I to tell you differently.  So as you can see, you will never find me being the one to persuade someone to think the way I do.  I have a few things that I take a stance on, but even those I am not willing to share because I simply don't need any extra drama in my life.  It seems like a person's political beliefs are allowed to be mocked, dismissed, and I have even seen some people harassed for their political stance.  This is strange to me because a lot of people take their political stance as serious as religion, and we all know that speaking bad about another religion is especially off limits, so why is it ok to do this about their politics.  I just really don't get it.  You have a passion for it...fine, great!  Use the passion in a good way, instead of harassing people who think differently.  And if we really think about it, I seriously doubt you are going to make a point or change someone's mind in a political stand off.  Chances are you both have your minds made up.

mothering stress

Being a mother is stressful all day everyday...when I am thinking about it.  The thing is, the days I sit back and enjoy and not worry about checklists, what this book says, or what these people think, its not stressful at all.  I sometimes find myself overwhelmed with pressure for really stupid things like, "oh my gosh Max doesn't know his right from his left or how to count to 10, I must be doing something terrible!" or "Jerry still refuses to use his fork and tries to eat grass sometimes, I must have really done something to screw him up!"  But then when I sit back and think about it there is nothing wrong with them and if I would just quit freaking out about it all the time it would be so much easier.  Sure Max can't count to 10 yet like the books says he should, but he can sing a lot of songs he has memorized so there is clearly nothing wrong with his brain.   I'm probably just stressing the number thing too much.  And sure Jerry doesn't use his fork, but it is easier not too, so that makes sense...the grass thing I am not quiet sure about.

I am seriously considering home schooling my children.  I am just not a fan of all the stress that is put on these little guys to take tests or keep up with what certain people think ALL kids should know and if they don't then they are deemed to have a problem.  I truly believe both of my children are unique...everyone's child is unique.  I guess what I am wrestling with is I want to homeschool and a lot of people think it is stupid and they will not learn all they need to learn, but I am not sure how sending them to a classroom with 15 plus kids all trying to grasp the same concept at the same time on a regimented pace is going to guarantee they learn "the things they need to know."

I guess a lot of it depends on my children and what they want out of life, but right now I am heavily leaning towards home school.  Any thoughts or tips for home schoolers out there or those who want to home school or even those completely opposed to it?

I'm not an "earthy mama"....right?

There are so many parenting styles out there and I think I am a mix of all of them, but every now and then somebody will say something that makes eludes to the facts I am completely earthy!  The other day I asked Autumn to pick me up some wipes from the store, she knows I am really specific about the things I want so she calls me to ask which kind, and of course I missed the call.  Once I finally realize and call her back she is already done but says, "I was just calling to see which wipes you wanted, but then I remembered everything you have is 'natural' so I got you the natural care wipes with aloe."  Great, that is exactly what I would have gotten, but what does she mean by natural?  I never thought of myself as that way.  She thinks it just evolved after I had babies and I am now a complete natural, earthy mom type.  I still don't completely see it.  I guess I could be an "earthy type of mama" because:

* I do cloth diaper my children...but I started this to save money and because Jerry's skin is so sensitive that if he wears a disposable for more than a few hours at a time he will break out in a huge rash.

Rumparooz are the best!! 

* I did breastfeed for quiet a long time in todays standards...but I absolutely hated the first month (both times) and it was very beneficial to me because it helped take all the baby weight off.  Also it saved us a ton in formula, which both boys never liked the taste of.
* I do make all my own baby food...but this is because I don't trust what anyone else thinks qualifies as healthy.
*I am a huge believer in co-sleeping...there is not really a but to this. I believe that it is one of the best things you can do, but its not always comfy when a 2 and 1 year old are putting their feet in your face in the middle of the night.  I think I am about to cut off the co-sleeping and the two of them can continue to co-sleep, while I co-sleep with my husband :)

Our naps are the best!

*I am a huge baby/toddler wearer...I can see how this bonding is good and bad.  I carried Max around in a sling/carrier so much that for months I was the only one he would let hold him, but we are so close and I love it.  I still carry him around all the time and he is 2 years old.  I wore Jerry everywhere after he was born, but it was really helpful, I really needed my hands to keep up with a 16 month old.  Jerry is kinda in an independent stage right now, but he is still held probably more than he walks.

Love this wrap...especially when they are little and cuddly

Not sure if its considered baby wearing if it not a wrap, but Max like the Bjorn and Jerry liked the wrap.

*I do believe organic is the best and my kids snub most stuff that isn't organic, especially milk...but who doesn't think this way anymore?!
*Yoga loving both me and my children...but we are not really that good, or at least I am not.
*The controversial vaccine issue- I don't believe that my child needs to have a shot for hep B just minutes old.  Could someone please explain to me how my child could possibly come in contact with this?!  Such a new and pure little human does not need to be dosed up with vaccines just hours old, in my opinion.  Max has had some of his shots...but only the ones I feel comfortable with.  He will probably get more when he is older and his body is more able to take on such a shock.  Jerry also has a few.
*I truly believe in chiropractic and holistic medicine...because it works.
*All of our cleaning products are made from plants or 7th generation...but that is just because they work the best and smell better.

There is probably more things I do that my sister or anyone else would classify as earthy, but I really don't see them until someone points them out.  I think it is more just personal preference than earthy...what do you think?

Date Night

I have always heard that it is very important for your marriage to make sure you have date nights after you have babies.  You have to make time for each other and make each other feel important.  To be honest, I am too tired for date night.  Can I please just have a date night where the sitter comes over and I take a nap?!  The thought of getting dressed (in actually jeans..something I rarely do now), fixing my hair, makeup and trying to find a pair or shoes that cover my un-pedicured toes is just too much work.  But I do it because it makes my husband happy.

Last date night I fell asleep in the movie theater.  It was pathetic and I felt really bad.  Luckily my husband is very understanding and was not outraged or embarrassed by it.  Not sure when our next date night will be, but I promised I would stay awake for the whole thing.  I think movies are just out of the question for us.  We need some new date night ideas in our town that is severely socially challenged.  If you are not looking to get drunk at a bar or go to the movie you are pretty much out of luck.

Run...stop...run...stop

Running with two babies is hard.  I once heard that if you pick a calf up and lift him over a fence everyday and continue to do that, that you will be bale to do that same thing when the calf has grown into a cow (it was probably worded better but that was the jest I got from it).  So this was the theory I was banking on.  I thought that if I run with the boys in a stroller everyday from the time they are little, I won't notice them slowly getting bigger and consequently heavier.  Boy was I wrong!  At first it wasn't so bad. I could push those little guys easy for about 3-5 miles...and then all of a sudden one morning as we were running my body was just giving out on me.  It was depressing, but I knew it would eventually happen.  It was getting to the point that we weren't really running consistently anyways.  We would run about half a mile and then I would see two tiny little hand lifted up at me asking for juice, snacks, high fives, or just attention. They had officially reached the stage where it was not so much fun to cheer mama on while she runs.  So I did what any mom would do...I ducktaped a portable dvd player to the stroller so they could watch a movie while I ran.  It worked like a charm, except they were still very heavy and my body was still telling me that it had had enough.

Now I have decided that I only run with the boys when I plan on only running around 3 miles because that is all I can handle.  I wish I could go longer, but I just can't.  I am sure there are some amazing runners out there who just think I am crazy for not being able to keep going (my mom, who is a beast at running!) but it is something I have had to learn to deal with.  That and the fact that my mile pace is crazy slow, but hey, I make up for it in distance, so get off my back.
Now that the boys both go to playgoup on Wednesday, I really cherish and look forward to being able to just go out for a long run by myself, for hours if I want to.  If it happens to rain on Wednesdays I feel like I am being punished.

The boys starting weight running:

Max-16 pounds
Jerry- 8 pounds
Stroller- is about 5-7 pounds.
Grand total of = 29 to 31 pounds

The boys ending weights...so far (we will see when I can't run with them at all, lets hope its far away):

Max-37 pounds
Jerry-22 pounds
Stroller 8-10 pounds (we have to count all the toys, snacks, juices, dvd players and whatever they decide to bring along)
Grand Total =67-69 pounds

So if you see me running with the huge double stroller on the side of the road or park and I look like I am about to die...I probably am.  But don't worry my mom will be ahead of me a lot...probably about to mile me, and looking to push the boys for a little bit when I no longer can.  God bless you, you natural runner you!  I only hope I can be in as good of shape as you are!  Until then, I will be happy with what I have, but constantly working on my stride (literally) to get just a little bit farther.

My big race is the end of March and i am excited!  13 miles will be my longest race and I hope to finish a marathon before this winter, we will see how that goes

Baby Weight

Baby weight sucks!!!  It just sticks around forever and ever!  I know celebrities are not real people and its their job to look good, but its an impossible standard to live up to.  How do these women loose all their baby weight in less than 3 months?!  I would like to think that if I have a cook, personal trainer, nanny, and unlimited extra money that I would look as good as Heidi Klum shortly after having a baby, but I just know I wouldn't.  I am one of those unfortunate souls that has always struggled with making sure I do not gain weight.  My metabolism just sucks big time!  Not to mention I can get addicted to sugar pretty easy.
I was also the type of pregnant woman who just gets pregnant EVERYWHERE...it was not cute to say the least!  No matter how much I worked out my legs, arms, and back there was no stopping the undeniable fat spreading all over my body.  It was pretty depressing, but when I learned that I had gained my 26 pounds at only 6.5 months I knew it was only going to get worse from here so I just buried myself in sweet treats.  In my defense, the last few crazy pounds that I put on were completely out of my control.  On my last doc appointment I was informed that I had gained 11 pounds in just a week!!  Absolutely nuts!  Yep, it was preeclampsia's fault that is just brought on my really sucky bad luck, but still I was getting bigger and bigger whether I could control it or not.  On delivery day with Max I am embarrassed to say that I had gained a crazy 65-69 pounds, went up 4 jeans sizes and had approximately 4 chins...yuck.  A lot of it was preeclampsia's fault, but also a lot of it was completely my fault.
When I was finally in the clear to work out again 6 weeks later after the c-section I thought it would be easy.  After all, I love to workout, lift weight and run.  I am being serious, I really do love it. However, my body was fighting mad at me for torturing it for 8 months.  My knees couldn't stand to run on the extra weight and my stomach muscles felt like they were ripped in two.  So I had to do the unthinkable and start at square one...like something I have never experienced in my life.  I started walking and having to use a huge exercise ball for my stomach work outs.  Slowly, I was able to run.  The day I found out I was pregnant with Jerry I was successfully running 4 miles (and loving every minute of it) back to a size 8 jeans (which I was pretty proud of considering I was in 12-14 territory not that long ago), and I had lost 66 pounds!  I was happy, and I vowed never to do it again...of course I did it again!

I gained around 60-65 pounds with Jerry and of course I was pregnant everywhere again.  It really sucked big time because I was actually taking steps to prevent it.  I was eating right and still running, until I was informed that I couldn't run anymore.  Honestly, I don't know how it happened.  The weight is coming off slower this time and sadly I am still not back to where I want to be :(  I have lost 55 pounds, but I am still carrying around that stupid little lower belly flab all women who have made a human being have.  I am back to my comfy size 8 jeans, but I really want to be in my size 6.  When I really get depressed I have to step back and look at what I have accomplished.  I really have lost a lot of weight and made two human beings.  Sounds pretty super to me!  I know I have a way to go to look the way I want, but I am taking the approach now that I am not going to stress about it.  I love to run, so I have a theory that if I just keep signing myself up to run in races I will train harder and loose more weight (or I guess inches, because at this point I am not too concerned about my weight number I just want to look more toned.)  So far it is working, but we will see what this holiday season of yummy feasts brings on.

Breastfeeding!!

Ok when did breastfeeding become such a controversial thing?!  Surprisingly men and a lot of women think its not only weird, but that I am starving my baby!  I just don't get it.
I breastfed Max for 6 months and Jerry for around 8 -9 months and believe me I have had more than my fair share or disapproving looks, comments, and just out right stares.  First of all let me clarify, I am not one of those women that just bare boob feeds my babies in public...or really even at home for the matter.  I always have a cover of some sort.  However, even with a cover people acted like I should go hide in a dark closet and shut the door to do "my business!"  Those of you that have small babies on the boob know that if you only breastfed at home then you would literally never leave the house!  Those little guys have to eat every 2-3 hours and it can take an hour just to get out of the house sometimes.  By the time Jerry got here I was a pro at breastfeeding in public and I am proud to say we haven't had any major wardrobe malfunctions that would make anyone uncomfortable.  I used to think people got so upset about public breastfeeding because some women do breastfeed bare boob in public, so I thought I would never encounter these people who are just outraged by it, but I surely did.  Then I thought they were just upset because I guess it could be possible that a cover could slip off or something, but no, they were outraged by just the act of breastfeeding! I have had a woman tell me, "why do you waste your time breastfeeding when they have made formula so much better for the baby than breastmilk?"  Seriously?!  You think that they have come up with something better?  You really need to check your sources.  Thankfully everyone in my family is very pro-boob, so I never encountered any family problems or objections.  They were also never gave me an uncomfortable look when I hand over a bottle of pumped breastmilk if I was going to be gone to long to make it back to the next feeding.  Weirdly enough, some people are even freaked out about that!  Hand over a bottle of pumped breastmilk to any teenage babysitter or nursery watcher at church and just watch them wiggle with the uncomfortable feeling they have.

It got to the point that I was just tired of dealing with all the looks so I did everything possible to minimize breastfeeding at restaurants, other people's houses, malls, etc.
1.) I was a big fan of "the top off" as Reed called it.  I would always make sure to feed the boys just before I put them in the car, even if they had just ate.  I wanted to make sure their tank was full.
2.)I retreated to the car a lot to feed the boys!  Thankfully my car has a dvd player, so I wasn't completely exiled.
3.)I always made sure I had a bottle of breastmilk with me and I just prayed the boys would take the bottle from me.  Those who breastfeed know that the baby is rarely going to take a bottle from the mom because they prefer the real thing!

I just wish it would just be more socially acceptable to have babies in the world.  I never realized how many people are so anti-baby until I have two of my own!

Also I want to say I know breastfeeding is not for everyone and a lot of times it just doesn't work out.  The beginning is extremely hard to master...not to mention painful for the first couple weeks.  I don't give you disapproving stares for giving your baby formula, so don't judge me or my babies for being on the boob team.  I'm not a better mom for breastfeeding and your not the better mom for formula.  To each their own, we all have to find what works best for us.  Were all on the same team, so just give it a rest!

TIME OUT!!!

Discipline...yeah I'm not the best at it.  One of my worst parenting qualities is that I tend to give in a little more than I should or I'm not as consistent as I should be.  Reed on the other hand has no problem with the discipline, but he works and I stay at home with Max, so discipline falls under my job description.

My failed attempts at discipline:


1...2.....3.......ummm now what?!!
  Yeah, this doesn't do anything but teach your child how to count to 3!  I would say, "Max, please sit in your chair before I count to 3."  Why would I say that?  No idea!  Is the word "3" the punishment or is the next thing I do after "3" supposed to be the punishment, and if so what do I do?  I quickly discovered that while many books claim this is effective and some mothers swear by it, it wasn't for us.  All I ended up doing was having to tell Max to do something more than once and what kind of example is that teaching my child?  I always felt like it was teaching him that I really don't mean anything until I have counted to 3 or said it 3 times.  Call me crazy but that doesn't sound like a lesson I should be teaching.

Spankings!
     I was spanked growing up and I am not emotionally or physically messed up because of it.  I grew up knowing that spankings are just a part of life and if I want to avoid that part of life then I better behave.  I also thought all children responded to spankings...turns out they don't!  Spanking Max not only breaks my heart, but it also really doesn't work at all.  There are some situations where it has been very effective, but not many.
situation 1:  If Max is about to touch something hot or do something that will cause him a lot more harm that a spanking ever would, I spank his hand or thigh.  It works like a charm everytime.  He immediately stops doing whatever is was he was doing and I don't usually have to tell him again.  However, if I was to tell Max, "quit throwing a fit or you will get a spanking." it wouldn't work at all.
Situation 2:  Anytime Max is just being a "bully" to his brother, friend, or animal, I immediately spank him.  I am honestly not sure why this works, but it does.  Max is not a "bully" often, but the few times he has pushed someone around and I take him away from the situation to talk to him and let him know he is getting a spanking because he wasn't treating people kindly he is always very appologetic and almost embarrassed for his actions.

TIME OUT!
      Yep, who would have thought that this discipline methods works the absolute best for Max?!  It's not only beneficial to him, but also to me as well.  Sometimes in a stressful or frustrating situation we all just need a timeout.  Time outs are absolute torture for Max.  He hates to sit still and especially hates to be quiet.  Anytime he is throwing a tantrum I know a timeout will get him over it quickly.  He is either just frustrated at a situation and the timeout helps give him a minute to calm down and step away from the situation, or he is just being a little toddler who morphs into a small gargoyle a few times a day!

Teaching Max what timeout is was a whole other problem.  Our first week of introducing timeout to the discipline method was stressful.  Max never sits still for 15 seconds, so getting him to understand he was bad and as a punishment he has to sit in a chair and not talk or move for almost 2 minutes seemed like a huge leap.  The first couple days were basically spend in the timeout chair because we kept having to "redo" the timeout.  He would get up and run off, talk, scream, cry, kick, bite, and basically anything to distract from the punishment!  It was my wonderful Dad who had the solution.  One day, Max was being extremely bad and throwing a fit because he wanted some candy.  Dad just walked in and said," Time out Max man."  Then he proceeded to carry Max to the corner and then they both sat down in the chair staring at the wall.  Max would try and get up and Dad would just hold him down in his lap.  All the screaming and crying and dad didn't budge an inch! He would say, "this will all be over when you sit still and quit crying until the duck quacks." (Our time out timer is a little duck that quacks instead of buzzes.) About 15 minutes later Max had successfully completed 2 minutes of time out by sitting still and not talking!  It was a Christmas miracle...except it was only April!  We never had a problem with time out again!  Plus Max will avoid it at all cost!
    *For the record:  Max and dad are still the best of friends and I seriously doubt any emotional damage was created.  Also THANK GOD for the wisdom of grandparents!  I would seriously be lost without it.